Molestation preview 06 - Golda

6 - Golda

As Francis grew a little older, he Lily allowed him to go as far as a block away from home, as long as he was with the neighborhood kids--but only very rarely.

One day, he went around the block with two of his hoodlum friends, Bob and Barry McMeans. They met some girls who had a tree house. There must have been six or eight neighbor kids gathered in the tree house and they all took turns playing doctor and nurse. When it was Francis’ turn to play patient he was apprehensive. When they pulled his pants down all the kids laughed because his peewee was so small.

Francis went home all red in the face. Lily asked what the problem was, but Francis was too embarrassed to say. She called Mrs. McMeans and asked her. Mrs. McMeans said Bob and Barry had come home thinking they were alone and laughing their heads off about the size of Francis’ peewee. She had cornered them and they had admitted to playing doctor and nurse.

Lily just did not know how to handle a growing boy all by herself. She threatened him with military school if he did not behave. Francis did not know what he did wrong. He was just playing with the other kids. It had been their game.

“You’re better than those heathens. They’ll drag you down.”

☼

Two weeks later, Lily found Francis on the bed with the church secretary’s son. They each had the other’s genitals in their hands. She opened the door when she heard Francis say, “Go ahead, and then I’ll do it to you.” She could only imagine what that meant.

☼

Steve was Golda’s brother. Golda liked Francis--a lot. She did not believe he was gay.

Steve had begun to spend more time doing guy things in hopes that he could shake the ‘faggot’ label.

☼

Golda, meanwhile, would wait for Francis and walk him home. Lily let them play together with wagons and tricycles where she could watch them. Sometimes the families visited and the children did coloring books or discussed Jesus together.

Golda did not believe in Jesus. Lily could talk about little else but Jesus.

Golda said Jesus was just some prophet that Christians tried to deify. Francis did not even know what deify meant. He hoped it was not something bad.

Francis tried to explain to Golda that the Jews had murdered Jesus.

Golda, “I’ll bet you even believe that Mary was a virgin.”

Francis said he guessed he did, since he did not even know what a virgin was.

Golda tried to explain to him what virginity was. She took him in the bedroom and showed him that she had no peewee.

Francis, “Then how do you go pee pee?”

“Through this little hole silly. Here show me what you have.”

He pulled down his pants and she laughed. “Not much, but you got more than my brother. Anyway, if you stick you’re pee pee in my pee pee when your pee pee is hard and break my cherry, then I won’t be a virgin anymore.”

“I don’t get hard.”

“You will. Give it time.”

Francis and Golda had a real serious relationship for their young ages. Golda explained all about Judaism and Francis taught her all about the Nazarene Church.

She explained to him what girls want and how they feel about things. Francis was not sure what other boys thought because he had not been allowed to play with them much, but he told her how he felt.

☼

They were getting older and their parents were not watching so closely, so they decided to take matters in their own little hands. They set up a lemonade stand and used the proceeds to go to the movies.

Francis found the movies very liberating. He came to realize that his mother did not own the rights to all truths. Golda liked the movies because there were so many Jewish actors and directors.

Golda decided to bake pastries and sell them along with the lemonade. She could make more money with pastries. Then she started making and selling jewelry.

Francis, not to be out done, took up leatherwork. He could sell a good belt for three dollars.

Golda made the most beautiful Star of David pendants and sold them strung on a chain. She could sell them for four dollars. Understanding that she was only making half as much money as she could, she started to make crucifixes. She could sell them for five dollars. Christians did not understand the value of a dollar bill.

Francis started tooling belts with a Star of David Pattern and other belts with fish. The fishermen liked to buy his fish belts, even the Jewish fishermen not realizing that it was meant to be a Christian sign. Farmers bought his Star of David belts. They thought he had been tooling cowboy belts with sheriff badges on them.

It was not until he started making candelabras that his mother noticed something was wrong. Why were there so many candles? Nobody would buy candelabras, with so many candles.

Nevertheless, they sold.

Francis decided to embellish them so he could sell more. He started putting a Star of David in the center.

☼

One day Lily came into Francis’ workshop to see what he was doing and started shrieking. “Child of Satan! Blasphemer! Let me see your forehead! If my eyes were better, I could see the ‘666’ on your forehead.”

Francis, “Golda and I are just making things sell to people at our street table. We have a good business going.”

“You’re selling out to Satan! You’re no son of mine! You’re just like your father--whoring around with another woman.”

“We were just making some money to go to the movies.”

“I thought you were spending your idle time studying the Bible.”

“I do study the Bible Ma! Jews are in the Bible.”

“Remember, I told you if you did not learn the gospel and behave yourself I would have to send you away?”

“What’s wrong with me doing something to make money with Golda?”

“What’s wrong? She’s Jewish for Christ’s sake!”

“I thought you liked her.”

“Jesus wants us to love our Hebrew brothers. It is not their fault that their ancestors murdered Christ. Christ forgives them, but we shouldn’t be going to bed with them.”

☼

When Francis was ten years, the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor.

Molestation preview 05 - Penitentiary Justice

5 - Penitentiary Justice

One day the teacher called everyone in from recess. She did a head count. She was two or three short. She did not have to recount because she recognized at least one missing face.

She went to the door and looked outside. There were no children to be seen. She was afraid there had been a kidnapping. She decided to close the door to prevent the escape of any more children and to notify the principle. She reached back to unlatch the door, so it would close; and there was Francis embracing little Steven Goldstein. They were both enjoying a, for that age, passionate and long kiss. They were oblivious to the teacher standing there.

“Ahem! Are you boys finished? The rest of the class is inside waiting to sing.”

Lily was quite disturbed when the principal called her in to tell her what had happened.

“I wouldn’t worry about it Mrs. Noir. Children that age--they like to experiment. I wouldn’t be alarmed unless it continues.”

Steven Goldstein lived across the street from the Noir residence. Francis had spent many days longing to cross the street to play with Steven. Lily had not allowed Francis to cross the street--and now this. She would have to watch him more carefully now.

She watched everything. She yelled at him when he was in the bathroom gliding airfoils of toilet paper across the room. She insisted that she inspect his toilet before he flushed it and screamed at him if he accidentally flushed. She yelled at him not to spend too much time playing alone in the bathtub.

She took to not letting him play with other boys on the block, even when they promised not to let him cross the street.

☼

After a few years with no incidents, she allowed him to go to the movies with the boys in the neighborhood.

Her natural instincts got the better of her and she reverted to treating him as though he were a normal boy, after all, he was her child. She treated him as she thought she should. She drummed into his head to leave little girls skirts alone. She had reverted to her fear of men and how they treated women. She seemed to forget about her recent fear that he would not leave little boys pants alone.

☼

She received word from the penitentiary that Theodore had died. The inmates had found him alone and strangled him. They had tied him upside down to cell bars and cut off his penis. They had written in blood on his belly ‘MOLESTER.’

Lily tried to keep the fate of Theodore from Francis. Especially, Lily never told Francis what the prison mates had done with Theodore’s penis.

☼

One day his friends cornered him at school.

“You’re father’s a molester.”

“No!”

“You’re father’s a molester.”

“No!”

“You’re father’s a molester and we can prove it.” They showed him a newspaper with a picture of his father and read him the story about how he died.

“No! It’s not true!”

“Is this or is this not you’re father’s picture?”

“Alright! Alright! Alright! Alright! He’s my father.”

He went to the grove of trees behind the school and cried and cried.

Steven came to see him, “I’m sorry Frannie. I tried to tell them not to do it.” He looked back at the boys who were making faces. “They said I was a faggot.”

“Maybe we are.”

☼

Alright! Three days later the principal found Francis hanging naked from his feet, which he had tied to the jungle gym bars. He was uncomfortable but alive and more embarrassed than ever.

Molestation preview 04 - Francis Assis Noir

4 - Francis Assis Noir -- 1931-1937

Francis was almost mistaken for a girl at birth. His penis had not popped righteously out, as a self-respecting penis should, and neither of his testicles had properly descended.

Eventually his penis did pop out and his testicles did descend. Until they did, Lily dressed him in girl’s dresses, and Theodore refused to brag about his ‘son.’

As Francis grew older, he tended to hang around with little girls. He showed no interest in little boy activities. This lasted for about three years.

Theodore was always scolding him and Francis hung onto his mother’s skirts.

Lily, having had one child, felt that she had paid her dues to the Lord. She no longer had a biblical need to have sex. She hated herself for the passions she felt and she began taking it out on Theodore. Not only did she blame him for awakening the devil in her, but she also threatened to cut him off from sex completely.

Francis could feel a move of the power center in his house from his father to his mother. Although he loved his mother, he felt threatened by the feminine seizure of authority.

Theodore struggled with his lust for a long time. He spent countless hours praying to God for strength to resist his own impulses, but his penis would not lie flaccid anymore, having tasted of the fruit of the vine. Tempers flared when they were alone and away from the congregation. Theodore implored Lily that it was the will of God that such devoted servants be fruitful and multiply.

☼

One day, Theodore's lust got the best of him. Lily caught him having sex with the neighbor’s daughter while the girl’s parents were at work.

This was all Lily needed, to finally cut him off for good. Not only did he get no sex; he had to cook his own meals, wash and iron his own clothes, and sleep by himself. Theodore’s lust was not to be repressed. It had become clear to him that the Lord was not so interested in the multiplication of the seed of Lily’s womb as he was in the multiplication of the seed of Theodore’s loins.

☼

Theodore gave up his post at the church. The church seemed to be defiling itself by following his wife’s skirts. He took off in the middle of the night with the fifteen-year old girl. Not only did he find his lust rising regularly but also the fifteen-year old found her buttocks frequently heaving. They traveled to the south--to the sultry climes.

Three months later North Carolina sheriffs found Theodore and the young girl in squalor in a semi-abandoned house. They had made it as far as Luck, North Carolina--a small town in the Bald Mountains, not far from Asheville. They had run out of money and the girl was obviously five months pregnant. Her belly was as big as a weather balloon. Since she was too pregnant to turn tricks, and since Theodore did not seem to know how to do anything anymore but preach; they had resorted to stealing jewelry from vacant mountain homes of the wealthy and stealing hogs and greens from the hillbillies. The newspaper account of the arrest said that Theodore was wearing nothing but a smile on his face when caught with his young girl.

☼

Francis knew his father had done something bad with his penis and a little girl. He did not really understand what he had done, but from that day on Francis had trouble sleeping. Little girls had appeared in his dreams in the past. Now it was more and more little boys.

The Barnstable congregation rallied behind Lily, who became the main minister of the church. She began to rail against the evils of men, sex, lipstick, and latchkey children.

She never failed to intimidate young Francis and remind him that he was a man boy. She constantly warned him of the evils that men do to women. She frequently reminded him that his penis was the root of manly sin. He was not allowed to flush the toilet without her having checked the bowl. She said she was looking for worms in his stool, but she took her greatest interest the day that Theodore accidentally squirted a load of Jergen’s hand lotion into the bowl. Her fears were totally unfounded, as he was not old enough to even have an erection.

☼

One day,Lily found Francis at the foot of a young peach tree sapling in a tangle of rope. He had climbed a short ladder and tied a rope around a tree limb. He had tied the other end around his throat. When he had jumped from the ladder, the tree limb had snapped off.

Lily tried not to ride Francis so much. She did not want to lose him. In time, he began to smile and play again. Francis rode a tricycle and played in his sandbox. He swung in his swing and played with his blocks.

He entered the Helen Hall grammar school and seemed to love kindergarten. He learned how to play jacks with the girls. It became an obsession with him.

☼

This was the same year that Germany seized the Rhineland and formed an allegiance with Italy.